


When Geese Ruled the Earth

by LittleRaven



Category: Expert Judgment on Markers to Deter Inadvertent Human Intrusion... - Sandia Labs, Untitled Goose Game (Video Game)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Post-Apocalypse, Alternate Universe - Untitled Goose Game Fusion, Crack, Crack Crossover, Crossover, Crossovers & Fandom Fusions, Geese, Gen, Humor, Inspired by Music, Post-Apocalypse
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-12-01
Updated: 2019-12-01
Packaged: 2021-02-26 02:21:57
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 411
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21635788
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/LittleRaven/pseuds/LittleRaven
Summary: Geese take over the Waste Isolation Pilot Plant, keeping the humans out. They live and adapt.
Comments: 5
Kudos: 34
Collections: 300bpm Flash Exchange November 2019





	When Geese Ruled the Earth

**Author's Note:**

  * For [draconicsockpuppet](https://archiveofourown.org/users/draconicsockpuppet/gifts).



> This crossover was written with the song ["Yakety Sax"](http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZnHmskwqCCQ) by Boots Randolph for inspiration. 
> 
> Thank you for requesting this amazing pairing of fandoms! I hadn't heard of this paper before. For others who might be interested, it is a paper on how to mark a site where nuclear waste is dumped, called "Expert Judgment on Markers to Deter Inadvertent Human Intrusion into the Waste Isolation Pilot Plant Kathleen," by M. Trauth, Stephen C. Hera, and Robert V. Guzowsti. It can be found [here](https://prod-ng.sandia.gov/techlib-noauth/access-control.cgi/1992/921382.pdf). [This page](https://urbigenous.net/library/WIPP/) has excerpts.

The geese had always been there, or so the collective geese wisdom told them. For as long as this place existed, with its jagged trails of earth rising above the rest of the land, geese had known its calm waters and brightly glowing grass. 

No other creatures lived there; there were a few who approached it, but they did not stay long, and they did not keep coming. Only the geese prevailed, with many a mighty flap of flightless white wings followed by honks beyond counting, and they were happy. They praised and thanked their home for protecting them, honoring it with tokens of hard, shiny reddish grey things dropped in the biggest lake. Those were always to be found in the area, as if to complement the softer colorful things which sometimes popped out of the ground, at certain times which occurred regularly. Every year the geese did this, on a day set apart for it. They did not have words, precisely, but if they had they might have called it Goose Day. It was a day all living geese observed, as had the generations of geese before them. 

On one such day, all things started as they usually did. The geese flapped, in memory of their past exploits, and ran to their items, collected throughout the rest of the year, to begin the dropping. One goose had found an especially shiny item. It was the pride of her hoard. Every time she collected something new and brought it back to her collection, she stopped to admire her crowning achievement as it gleamed. It’s glow was like that of the grass the fed upon, ever-present. No other year would compare; this would be the height of her life. 

She felt a tingling in her feathers. She flapped harder than she had ever flapped, honked louder than she had ever honked. She ran, and as she picked up her prize to take to the lake, she realized she felt lighter than she ever had, despite the added weight. The wind brushed over her feathers and feet. She looked down.

All the geese beheld her, the first of their kind who could fly. She rose higher, faster, bright against the sky. 

She was goose. They, too, were geese. They knew now what that meant, where their future might lead. Soon the land beyond, and all who dwelt on it, would know as well. 

One by one, each raised their wings, and flapped.

**Author's Note:**

> The premise of this story was inspired by a detail from an [article](https://kotaku.com/experts-say-geese-arent-actually-as-bad-as-untitled-goo-1840052479/amp) about geese and the Untitled Goose Game. 
> 
> The quote is as follows:
> 
> _“Domestic geese are bred to be loads bigger (about 6.5 - 7.5 kg), whereas wild greylags only weigh approximately 3-4 kg when fully grown. Because the domesticated form are so big, they most often are incapable of flying,” Scheiber said over email. “The domestic goose can have the same grey coloration as the wild goose, more often, however, they are completely white, or their feathers are a mix of both.”_


End file.
